I’m an Amateur

If “pro” is opposite of amateur, then call me Miles Davis (see Billy Madison).

I’m come to realize there are a few things I am definitely not “pro” about, like shaving daily or driving to work in the dark.

In fact, there may be more than a few things I am not “pro” about and having a blog gives me the chance to get them off my chest:

  • Coffee
  • Hate the stuff and am actively researching the production of coffee and the coffee bean to show it is actually more harmful than McDonald’s or Hummers. Plus, grown men who fawn over venti this and grande that are the downfall of the American male.

  • Inefficiencies
  • I’m lazy, but not inefficient, which is totally different than being fat, but calling yourself “big-boned”. Doing things the way momma or daddy did them does not cut it for me. Find the most optimal approach and go for it, regardless of how unorthodox it sounds or looks. I will actually like you more the if you think outside of the box.

  • Fan Boys (and girls)
  • Here’s to you Apple, North Face, Justin Bieber, and Twilight fans. Way to think for yourself and spend your money on what you want. What’s that? You didn’t? You bought what everyone else bought? Why? Because you have no sense of yourself and, ultimately, no self-confidence. Enjoy living your life so someone else can hopefully one day like you.

    Sorry – maybe that was the actual reason behind this post. I feel better – don’t you.

  • Peanuts in Candy
  • Snickers could have been the indisputable greatest – like Ali, but they decided to add the peanuts. What could have been. What could have been. Thankfully Twix stepped in and became the greatest ever. Don’t agree? Blame Snickers – it could have been them.

  • Drama
  • Irrational, unfounded, maniacal, elevated. These are the things I could do without. Come on, I’m talking to you, Come on (see Tears for Fears). I’m talking to you, embarrassed teenager (you won’t even be friends with these people in 2-3 years). I’m talking to you, morning coffee drinker, you who are somehow able to get ready for work, drive 30 minutes, but as soon as you walk in the door, forget how to function. Really? Drama! I’m talking to you Mr. rich man having to wait in line. That’s right. You have more money than me, but you are still behind me. Whoops, I dropped something. This may take a while to pick up. Debit/Credit/Cash? No, I think I’ll pay with check today. Take that money drama!

I’ve said before one of the benefits of having a blog is to think through things and process them. while this post may seem like it was written by a petulant little man (I’m not all that small), it actually serves a therapeutic purpose, so Ms. Drama caused by judgment, SORRY!

So – are you an amateur about anything? Let me know, because misery loves company (see Soul Asylum)


One thought on “I’m an Amateur

  1. Pingback: Best Feelings in the World | willy powell, pe

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